Flowerfairy

In my opinion you have possibly had an energetic attack and your resistance may have been low and some entity may have taken advantage of this. I would highly recommend seeking the services of a working shaman with a credible history of succesful treatment of others with similar issues. I recommend a shaman who charges for their time as you are completing an energy exchange with them for their service and they are less likely to be amateur. They need to be able to help you to gain protection around you and tell you what to do to avoid further issues. I would do this for you but I am still learning and although qualified by a master shaman still have a lot to learn and my personal life at the moment doesn't put me in the right space for doing this sort of work. I can highly recommend www.youtubeshaman.com if you can't find a shaman yourself.

That is the most epic and awesome journey I have read yet. I think you will be an amazing shaman after full training. I'm glad you have help for your autism and there are so many ways to help others with the Internet these days if that makes it more comfortable but you can do whatever you feel comfortable with. I see lots of working with elemental energies and rebirthing in your journey. All the best.

I'm by no means an expert but done several journeys and it's a bit like stage fright and quite normal. Sometimes it's just trying too hard, try to relax and have fun with it and not be too serious. Like everything practise helps.

I believe that these energies do exist but feed on our fears. If you are scared and think of these energies and entities they will appear. We can create what we concentrate on and if you feel that is part of your life it will be. To reduce your fears, know and believe if possible that you are in a safe universe that has only love for you. Call on your ancestors and angels for protection and call a protective white energy sphere around yourself to lock it out. There are many YouTube videos on protecting yourself from negative energies. I have offered my services for free in the healing section if you like. I have had very similar experiences and felt under attack in the past but when you realise you are part of it and there is no external power it all disappears.