Don't worry, I know you wern't passing judgement.
My view of a shaman is that it is a powerful responsibility to adhere for the living and the dead; by helping all life on earth as well as in the other planes of existance. I feel a strong sense of duty to help heal people and to keep the world in balance by using the abilities I have. At the same time it's not just a religion or a world view as it would become my life. It could not be something to just do on the weekends or in my spare time or when spiritual holidays come and go, it's 24/7 awake and dreaming with no rest. There's also the social side of things, well, not so much social as I've always felt set apart from everyone in my life; but to take this path would almost obliterate any chance of an average social, family and work life. I don't mean to make this sound negative in general as I know the positives are much more powerful than the negatives - maybe I'm just holding onto the material world and by doing that it's torturing me? I don't know.
Without going into too much detail, I believe I did unknowingly journey a few times as a child in my dreams; but due to my background it was blocked out and put to the deepest parts of my mind as the material world took other. This would explain my research into different spiritual paths from a teenager to present because, from every spiritual path I managed to take something from it that was shamanic in nature. For instance I take my ethics from Buddhism, my skills from spiritualism (in terms of working on a psychic level.) In Paganism I took Yggdrassil from Norse Mythology, akin to the world tree in shamanic cosmology and learning how energy works through practicing witchcraft.
But I do feel that if I journey, the mediumistic abilities I had as a child will be reinstated into my adult self and could be very intense to deal with by opening this world up again, that's if I was correct about journying as a child. Everyone has free will, one could choose to be Christian then change their view through Hinduism, or Buddhism or Paganism; but I don't believe this is something I could just stop or turn my back on if I journeyed now.