Looking for the next step maybe

[Heather]

Hello everyone, I'm new here and I'm unsure about where my journey is going at the moment.

 

I don't call myself a shaman, because I haven't followed a tradition of shamanism. I have heard people speak about shamanism in terms of other cultures (often ancient or tribal cultures), but that feels like I'm learning about something outside of me, when really I would like to further my understanding of what I experience... or what's in me.

 

What draws me to shamanism is that the journeys I have experienced through my dream world over the years have shown me the way and provided healing. I also feel connected with nature, I'm not afraid to talk to the trees (if no one is looking ) The past 8/9 years have been really tough, and I reached my bottom line about 5 years ago - but I've done a lot of self work (and conventional psychological therapy) and I feel like I'm in a new place and it's a good place, but I don't really know this new person and I don't really understand where I'm going at the moment.

 

So forgive me if I'm in the wrong place, I'm a little lost

 

[ralph]

Welcome Heather,

 

Feel free to wander around and ask questions, we would be happy to give you the best answers we can. I don't think you're in the wrong place but of course that's for you to decide.

 

Ralph

[silenceseeker]

Hi Heather,

 

I would like to welcome you as well. Please do ask questions, it's the first place to start to find out if you are in the right place.

 

Lorrie

[Heather]

Thank you for the welcome. It is quite an unrelated question, but Ralph, I am curious what your picture is?

[ralph]

Heather,

 

It is called a möbius strip. The surface has only one side.

[Heather]

thank you ralph, it's interesting.

[sandstorm333]

Hi,

What you wrote I could have written and yes its the last 5 years for me to. I am at the moment less confused and my mind is not on speed anymore. Five years with a mind that never stops? But what an adventure? Around, and inside. I want it to be over and at the same time I dont.

[Heather]

I don't think that working on healing will (or needs to) ever stop as long as we're living and having new experiences.

 

At the time of my breakdown, I was suffering the affects of trying to keep going with traumatic experiences dragging me back into them. A doctor diagnosed me with post traumatic stress disorder, but the treatment for that was to go back to those harsh experiences and deal with them. What I had to deal with was a lot to do with working out what was my will and what belonged to somebody else. What I read here about recapitulation seems very similar in regards to energy.

 

I still have some relatively minor clearing to do, but it was something that was sticking, and I believe I needed to read what I have done here about recapitulation to get to this part of it. Sadly I can't do the classes due to the time difference in my country, but I do what I can.

[sandstorm333]

Hi Heather,

Five years ago I finally got my diagnis. Ptsd, but much is happening in this feald and now I Im on to Complex Ptsd. I have peeled of most layers of my traumas and come to all the understandings regarding them as i can and even though i feel I have som kind of direction of where Im going its a very frightening direction. The reason I ended up on this forum is basically how it all started 5 years ago. I was in a very complicated and dangerous situation. There was no way out, no help to be got. My mind and my body was exhousted and my abilities to always find solutions just wasnt there any more. So i used the only thing I had left to find strenght. My imagination. I imagined myself like floating on a wave, sometimes just going with it, letting it take me wherever it wanted, but sometimes making little turns and twists like I was on a surfboard. Then things started to happen. Inside me and around me. I had to accept that the world was not really what I had thought it was, but accepting it I understood that it had always been this way but my eyes had been closed to it. As my brain started to heal I connected with what I will never understand and dont want to more and more. It has all calmed down now but something inside me tells me its only rest, for a while, more healing and then I dont know, I can only guess, but Im hoping its not so.

[Moonshadow]

{{Heather}}

 

It was mostly my dreaming activity that drew me to seek answers and brought me here, among other experiences. I think when a person is energetically bent and experience things outside the sphere of what is considered normal human experience they want to understand. This tradition places a lot of emphasis on self-healing when you start out- self healing through retrieving your energy from life's traumatic impact. The more energy you retrieve, the more you are able to see clearly and take control of your life. As you've said, self-healing is an ongoing process and is a good thing. I do hope you have the opportunity to take a recapitulation class or work on it yourself (there are articles available on the shamans cave site).

 

But, welcome to the cave, and I hope we can assist you on your journey.

 

Mandy

[Heather]

Thank you.

[Beth]

Hi Heather -

 

just a note to tell you - we do have students in the UK and Europe, Australia, and South Africa. I know it can be tough to accommodate the time, but it's do-able. Certainly no pressure, though! Whatever seems best to you. I'm certain you'll find the right path, and anything we can do here to help, please let us know.

 

Beth

[Heather]

Thank you Beth - I worked it out that classes would start around 3am. If I were retired or unemployed, I would get up for a class. But as I work full time as a teacher, I really wouldn't be giving my best in my job if I were to do that.