Psychic Attack by an Alligator?

[Phoenix Raven Littlemoon]

I was wondering if someone has ever heard of this and / or how to deal with it? Anyway, over the last few months, I've lost alot of weight and try as i might to gain it back, i can't. I've been to many doctors, and no physical reason for issue. So i started to meditate on it, and become aware in dreamtime when i feel uncomfy & wake up. What i began to see was when my solar plexus would react during sleep, i'd feel fear. Not reacting, I'd "scan" nearby, and often saw partial body of what looked like an alligator or crocodile. As i'd try to deal with it, it'd disappear or leave. It seemed to occur almost nightly, and ten i began to lose weight. I'd had something like this 10 years ago, and was able to track it to a brother that was 'feeding off' me and other family members to survive his physical illness. Breaking off contact with that brother, back then, i got better fast. Yet I can't seem to pinpoint this one; whom it is, and how to stop it.

 

What methods can i use to figure out whom it is? or how to deal with it? Or is it possible the alligator is a guardian protecting me from whatever is making me sick? Any insight would help, thx

 

PS wanted to add that I get symptoms of pancreas / spleen reactions, then smell weed, then feel stoned or drunk. When i say this doesn't belong to me, i feel fear, then really tired, and the sense of energy being drained or pulled towards feet. This started about late September, and may be related to a past room mate, a place i had to move out of. At other times, i smell vodka / cigars. Some nights, i have the same symptoms at the same time every night, and when i try to ignore it, i get hand cramps, causing me to wake up. At times that i've been able to breathe thru the pain, i've seen 1 of 2 female like figures, screech off in anger away from me, neither i recognize. About a month ago, one felt female, but had a turtle like head. And recently, its been the same long haired grey haired lady, reacting the same way. I seem to fall asleep super early, exhausted, then wake about 11:30 pm, then just after 2 am, and again just before 5 am. Its occuring at my new place, but the same pattern had occured at my last residence, the pattern i did notice that the grandma upstairs also woke up from what she later told me were panick attacks.

 

Is it possible that what was occuring there is still interfering with me at my new place? and if so how do i break the link? The one thing i have been able to track, is that it seems to come through the north.

 

Any ideas on how to deal with this? And reclaim my strength?

Edited January 19, 2017 by Phoenix Raven Littlemoon

[Phoenix Raven Littlemoon]

i also remembered too, that getting past the screaming women part, that i've had this kind of experience {see photo}, but its not me looking back at me, but my father in his earlier 20's, and usually pulling energy out of my mouth. Me and him do not get along. And since I moved back to my birth town, I've been losing the weight. is it possible it is him, and if so, how do i disconnect this once & for all? I have no contact with him, but my brothers do all the time, and i'm beginning to wonder if i should create some distance between them & I for a while? there is a feeling that by connecting to them, he gets direct access to me? Or uses them to get to me?

 

[kai]

Hello,

 

It sounds like you are highly sensitive and empathic. It really comes down to learning to know yourself and what is yours and what is not ; the boundaries between where you end and others begin. Recapitulation is the method for that and self-healing in general in this tradition, here's a link to an article with the basic exercise: http://www.shamanscave.com/self-healing/the-recapitulation. It takes some work but over time it really pays off and you come to know yourself on levels most people can't imagine. That doesn't mean instant results can't be had, some things can change really fast at times, just that as a method it relies on your own intent to heal and doesn't give a 'magic pill' solution. I think it should be pointed out use of drugs, whether they are plant allies or man-made doesn't really go with the recap and you should never recap under the influence, the ally will present you with connections that are twisted or simply not there, rendering the work you're putting ineffective or even destructive. It's great for recovering energy from past drug related experiences though, and getting rid of the connections that might still be there.

 

Regarding the energies you see/feel, knowing where they come from is as simple as tearing through the imagery presented by your mind and following the energy to it's roots. It might be difficult without having clarity of your own energy & emotions at first, for sensitive people it's easy to get confused about what is yours and what is not to a degree you might take on 'stuff' from other people without ever questioning if it's truly yours - and also in the opposite way, parts of your own energy can appear very alien to you. Clarity starts at home, once you truly know yourself then you will also know others because you can see clearly. In the meantime grounding helps, spending time in nature and connecting with it, and in general intending for clarity and to reclaim your energy and also to not take on energies outside yourself. Nothing can take your energy without your agreement on some level, it's good to remember that and truly understanding it removes a lot of drama because on a very deep level you come to the realization there's really no fight for your energy, other than the battle you're having with yourself.

 

You can always change the outside circumstances of your life, and sometimes that's absolutely necessary, but if you don't also change and heal yourself, the way your energy is configured and moves in the world will invite it all back into your life one way or another.

 

I hope you find strength and clarity,

 

Kai

[Phoenix Raven Littlemoon]

Hello,

 

It sounds like you are highly sensitive and empathic. It really comes down to learning to know yourself and what is yours and what is not ; the boundaries between where you end and others begin. Recapitulation is the method for that and self-healing in general in this tradition, here's a link to an article with the basic exercise: http://www.shamanscave.com/self-healing/the-recapitulation. It takes some work but over time it really pays off and you come to know yourself on levels most people can't imagine. That doesn't mean instant results can't be had, some things can change really fast at times, just that as a method it relies on your own intent to heal and doesn't give a 'magic pill' solution.

 

Thank you, i'll give that a try...

 

I think it should be pointed out use of drugs, whether they are plant allies or man-made doesn't really go with the recap and you should never recap under the influence, the ally will present you with connections that are twisted or simply not there, rendering the work you're putting ineffective or even destructive. It's great for recovering energy from past drug related experiences though, and getting rid of the connections that might still be there.

 

"the ally will present you with connections that are twisted or .... yes, i think i've "seen" the ally you speak of, at points, i get glimpses of a figure at these times, and they / he does 'project' fearful things....

 

Thx, I don't smoke the stuff, just over the years notice a link between some that do {ppl i've met}, and these symptoms, and my energy drains. They say it gives them energy, while i find mine drops...to me this isn't the weed, but they are taking energy from others and environment {house gets cold}

 

Regarding the energies you see/feel, knowing where they come from is as simple as tearing through the imagery presented by your mind and following the energy to it's roots.

 

I've done this a few times, without knowing it, and the last few times, i encounter a group of men, at least 3, torturing my cat, or the ones i have had in the past, to get me to do what they want. Though i don't have one now, it usually causes me distress & i wake up. As i try to get back there the upper body pain starts & can't. OMG! I just had a thought???? is this possibly a childhood memory?

 

Also in regards to upper body pain, I've seen self {esp. back area}, caught up in a web like substance, especially around my hands & wrists. I've not been able to untangle self, as physical pain occurs, but it feels connected to a "possessive" personality, someone that feels i belong to him, sees me as one of his 'things', and won't let go of me??? Feels related to living person though.

 

It might be difficult without having clarity of your own energy & emotions at first, for sensitive people it's easy to get confused about what is yours and what is not to a degree you might take on 'stuff' from other people without ever questioning if it's truly yours -

 

Thank you, I dreamt something like this yesterday, that of "picking up" stuff from people riding public transit {buses} to work. And that i'm picking up stuff, from direct contact with customers, that is starting to weigh me down. I also dreamt that of my right hand pain is because of being doll like or a plastic prosthetic, elbow to hand. I do not know anyone, or ever have, with this feature.

 

and also in the opposite way, parts of your own energy can appear very alien to you. Clarity starts at home, once you truly know yourself then you will also know others because you can see clearly. In the meantime grounding helps, spending time in nature and connecting with it, and in general intending for clarity and to reclaim your energy and also to not take on energies outside yourself.

 

I've been on a non-ordinary healing journey, most of my life, , due to events from about 20 years ago...just started "dreaming" of collecting lost parts of my self, and healing the wounds of old....I spent the majority of it, healing aspects of myself & my relationship to my mother, & her side of the family.

 

And i think where i am getting stuck has to do with "family issues", perhaps coming to terms with the idea that the male side, don't & won't ever accept me as "one of them". As I am starting to suspect my recent issues and pain has to do with old wounds, deep wounds, and not sure if I am ready {emotionally} to let them go {ppl out of my physical life}. I recently had a situation where i had to leave a very abusive home enviro, & called on family, even siblings for help. They told me to move out, so i did, BUT then they all abandoned me. They would not give a place to stay, would not help me with funds to stay somewhere. They would not answer the phone, nor open their front door....they ignored me. I was devastated. Yet ppl i worked with, helped me out. They were there for me, while family ignored me for 2 weeks. . After i got resettled, & all is good again, my bros come by & act as if nothing had happened. I still can't wrap my head around that. The irony is, i did "dream" of this exact behavior from them first in 2013, then again earlier in 2016, that they would eventually abandon me because they do not consider me par of the family, and are being influenced by the male parent. that their deep need for his love & acceptance, they are following "his advice" on how to deal with me {as in dream}

 

Nothing can take your energy without your agreement on some level, it's good to remember that and truly understanding it removes a lot of drama because on a very deep level you come to the realization there's really no fight for your energy, other than the battle you're having with yourself.

 

In journeys, i am / have finally found a part of me that i've been searching for, for a long time. Yet she won't come home with me? a feeling that another {older female usu. with her} won't let her come with me. She seems to talk to this part of me as if i am the bad person, and she can't trust me, but try as i might to see whom this woman is, she fades away. This 15 year old part of me reacts to me {because of 'guidance by other female'}, that i am the one she should be afraid of, that I am a danger to her, etc. I've been aware of this part of me, i am beginning to think, since October last year, where i believe i was able to retrieve her, but can't integrate her. That the pain is a sign that she is back with me, but we can't fully integrate or this female i dream of is interfering? Since the pain on right side started, i started to dream of driving with a female {not me} stuck to my right side, and won't let go. She seems about late 20's, early 30's, short dark hair. She sits slightly behind me, or I am partially on her left side lap. She has her left arm around my shoulder, holding onto me, and a painful grip with her right hand on my inner right thigh. At points i sense an overweight male to my left, sometimes trying to take over and drive, but i push him out, and drive my own car. then the pain reappears & i see this female to my right. I had this pain at my old residence, and when trying to fall asleep VERY aware of this overweight male laying on the bed behind me, causing me to wake up. Since i moved out, i rarely sense that, only the pain in arms / hands.

 

Is it possible the one that stole this teen part of me, is still holding onto that part? {yes, i said steal, i've always felt a soul thief in my past somewhere} and how do i dislodge them? Just before the pain started, I was aware of someone pushing me to the side, on my right side, pushing their way into my life, my body; and "dreams" of talking to a brother about having to let this person in if i want to keep my job {don't work there anymore, though} because???? but not why. When i left that place, pain instantly gone, but fear returned of abandonment. Again dreams of the same brother, but never remember them, only that he'd be mad...

 

You can always change the outside circumstances of your life, and sometimes that's absolutely necessary, but if you don't also change and heal yourself, the way your energy is configured and moves in the world will invite it all back into your life one way or another.

 

If i listen to the pain i am physically feeling, as to why this person is taking energy, then i'd say its someone i feel i "have to help", and / or need in my life....and that they have severe cardiac & lung problems. Prior to moving 'home', i was dreaming of a certain blond male figure in blue all the time, no one i recognize but feels like family, interfering in my life, or my ability to live it. And having reoccuring dreams of wasting away as i use all my energy / strength to keep this person alive, because they are dying of cancer.

 

How can i journey to find out whom this person really is? and how do i break the link / break the "agreement" / contract? So i can live my life, and they have to deal with theirs? I figure should also mention, that i've always had a psychic connection with an overweight brother most of my life, and have never been able to successfully track when & why it formed in the first place. Only in recent decade did i start to recognize that some of my dreams or ailments were his stuff, not mine. And if what i am currently dealing with is HIM refusing to let go of me?

 

I hope you find strength and clarity,

 

Kai

 

Also is it possible that the 'ghosts' i see are family, but my past life relations with them? as to why they feel familiar, yet don't recognize them?

[Sphinxy]

Hi Phoenix,

May I suggest you try stating one or both parts of this declaration any time you feel like you are being energetically drained or watched.

The alligator to me seems like a reptilian spirit - most likely it is not a guardian. Psychic attacks by reptilians are rather common in this realm. Assess your reaction to these beings when you see them - if you instinctively feel fear, they are most likely negative entities and trying to drain you through these emotions. If they're positive/helpful spirits, you will most likely feel a sense of love/being understood/protected in their presence.

It seems like you are dealing with more than one type of being - they are working together to make you weaker to feed from your energy. There are multiple ways to deal with this.

1. find a shaman skilled in seeing curses and energy forms who can dissociate them from you. Search for those that seem most connected to the perennial tradition and not influenced by social/spiritual conventions or their desire for success/esteem. If you'd like, I can approve/veto links you paste here.
2. starve these beings by refusing to buy into their game. Rather than feel fear with their presence, tell them either forcibly to go away, or completely ignore them - emotionally, mentally, energetically. Refocus your attention on something else. Do activities you enjoy and that make you feel revitalized.
3. focus on cultivating positive emotions within yourself. The more often you feel these, the more protected you will be. Ask for your spirit guides and benevolent beings to protect you and help you feel safe, calm, and free. You connect with these beings through love, hope, self-acceptance, and gratitude.
4. when you feel threatened, repeat something along the lines of "I am loved and I am worthy. I am safe and I am free. I am power-

fully protected. I am master of my body and ruler of my mind." Refuse to feel fear. Say this with confidence and personal power, centered within yourself.
5. imagine a blowtorch filled with electric violet light. Torch your body with this for protection. Create a gold or violet bubble around yourself, and intend that this bubble protect you from all outside interference, and seal in your own energy.
6. get into a meditative state and feel for your own energy. Strengthen and affirm it - feel for your core, and connect it to your heart. Be present, aware of your physical body, and breathe deeply through this process. The more strong and genuine your sense of self, the more power you have. Connect with your emotions and intuition, your innate sense of knowing - this will center you, while focusing too much on your thoughts will make you more dissipated.
7. adopt a crystal. Program it with the most intense, positive emotions you can feel - it will retain these vibrations, and through the crystal, you can remember how these feel in times when you've forgotten. Some suggestions here (scroll halfway down).
8. heal the shadows and wounds in your emotional body. The law of attraction states that you cannot draw any external experience to yourself that does not at some level match what is already within you. Here are some youtube videos that guide you through a process of emotional and psychological healing.

If, after all of this, you still feeling drained, try asking these beings individually - as calm and detached as possible - what they want, and why they're present. The answer might surprise you.

As a side note, you probably shouldn't try to retrieve aspects of yourself until you've dealt with the intruders - it's likely they won't want to return as long as you're experiencing pain.

This is a journey and process, so don't be dismayed if you don't see results immediately. No matter what happens, remember that you're growing and learning and getting stronger through your experiences and efforts. With a strong enough intention to heal yourself, you will resolve all of this (and much more!) in time. If you ever feel hopeless, remember that this feeling is most likely not your own. It seems that these experiences are the beginning of your shamanic initiation - it's often bewildering, but rejoice in the fact that you are not alone - and that once you make it through this, you will have deepened your access to ecstasy, mystery, and awe.

Sphinxy

[Phoenix Raven Littlemoon]

thank you

[Phoenix Raven Littlemoon]

The one thing i do still get is that it is less an alien.... but more an inbetweener between a living person & me. 10 years ago, I had the same kind of thing, & saw this alligator eating away at me & my brother, both of us really sick. Back then I was doing regular journeys, and did see that the animal was another brother whom was really sick at the time, "instinctively feeding" off of us to survive. My "feeling" is that it is the same person or another like in nature, feeding off of the life force of others...either using the alligator as the vessel or it reflects a primal part found within all people. On astral level, I saw the alligator, on higher planes I saw my older brother, and back then able to walk away from the relationship. And heal. Yet this one feels like it is still family? someone else that i am close to? a friend, co-worker?

 

For example, a friend of mine also dreams of great white sharks when dealing with people that "takers"...again, these animals driven by instinct alone. In her early training, she used to dream of being hunted by sharks, just before she got pain on her left side. Tuning into the pain, she said she saw a huge wound, bleeding profusely, from solar plexus to side of body, under her left elbow. Doing Reiki to heal the wound, she began to feel fear, and mild anxiety, & she told me she saw various faces {thoughtforms} projected at her of shark like people, Getting past that, to higher plane, she'd see a family member & his friends "up to no good", taking what they wanted from her because they did not care. Like vampires. As she continued to do her training & exercises, to heal the wound, she told me memories of trauma from her past arose, directly related to these family members. And that one member was diabetic, & refused to deal with it, forcing his little sister to {her left side pain} She broke off contact with these people, and has recovered quickly. Yet when i try to do same thing with alligator, I'd feel either alot of fear or intense anger directed at me, & it feels related to a brother like person? it reminds me of stuff i am encountering, and yet at same time, i believe it could be someone at work. As the collective group is "wasting away", chronically sick, even the strong & healthy ones.

 

Another thing i think may be related, as to why "alligators", and the whom it is connected to, is that of a poem / child's story, often read at bedtime. Read by the male parent to me & my siblings when we stayed over on the weekends. And i had nightmares associated with this poem soon after he started dating this creepy woman, something about her was / is not right. He is now married to her On a personal note, significant i know, is that this is a missing part of my past {no memories from age 10-12}. Reading on alligator / crocodile medicine, the one thing that does stand out is that of other alligators will eat her babies if starving.

 

 

Alligator Pie

Dennis Lee
From: Alligator Pie. Toronto: Macmillan, 1974.

Alligator pie, alligator pie,
If I don't get some I think I'm gonna die.
Give away the green grass, give away the sky,
But don't give away my alligator pie.

Alligator stew, alligator stew,
If I don't get some I don't know what I'll do.
Give away my furry hat, give away my shoe,
But don't give away my alligator stew.

Alligator soup, alligator soup,
If I don't get some I think I'm gonna droop.
Give away my hockey stick, give away my hoop,
But don't give away my alligator soup.

Anyway, either way there is something amiss at work, making everyone sick, and of the tracking i've done, I often see "vampires" in the hills, in the area, a few blocks from the mall plaza i work at, affecting more than just our store.

 

 

https://www.google.ca/maps/place/Mount+Tolmie+Park/@48.4569632,-123.327905,17z/data=!3m1!4b1!4m5!3m4!1s0x548f73fa5f73dc19:0x48655ba7341b38d!8m2!3d48.4569632!4d-123.3257163

Anyone sense anything in those hills? And if so, how to deal with it?

[Sphinxy]

Hi Phoenix -

I advise you to stop giving your attention to deciphering the identity of these beings, and focusing on the harm they've caused yourself and others. That is what they want, and only gives them power. Try to detach from them - emotionally, mentally, and psychically. The more you form your own perceptions and identity independently of how they have affected you, the less they can interfere.

A vampire can be any being who is energetically draining others. It seems from what you say that a healing of the land might be necessary as well as healing on an individual level for everyone involved here. What area do you live in?

Sphinxy

[Phoenix Raven Littlemoon]

Hi Phoenix -

 

I advise you to stop giving your attention to deciphering the identity of these beings, and focusing on the harm they've caused yourself and others. That is what they want, and only gives them power. Try to detach from them - emotionally, mentally, and psychically. The more you form your own perceptions and identity independently of how they have affected you, the less they can interfere.

 

A vampire can be any being who is energetically draining others. It seems from what you say that a healing of the land might be necessary as well as healing on an individual level for everyone involved here. What area do you live in?

 

Sphinxy

 

Thank you for reminding me of that one...what i focus on, and how it affects me....forgot about that "law of attraction" thing.....Its the same as complaining about how someone hurt you, i am remembering now one continues to give them energy....i remember this FX now....and what to do....

 

Also about area healing,this has also come to mind, it feels like the whole neighborhood is affected, as i have always felt the dense heavy energy in the area, and where it dissipates. Like a dome around this area,plus the mall just down the road....Google....1505 arrow rd, victoria, bc {canada} hope this helps

 

thx again

[Phoenix Raven Littlemoon]

I, shaman, journeyer, KNOWS how to deal with all this "stuff"...2 paths.....one is aggressive, mirror to mirror. The other part is "love", which is to chose?

 

 

[Mark]

I, shaman, journeyer, KNOWS how to deal with all this "stuff"...2 paths.....one is aggressive, mirror to mirror. The other part is "love", which is to chose?

 

 

Whichever one works.

[nixrana]

Black widows maybe That's such a beautiful place to live with fascinating trees and rock formations. Can you see all the way across the Straits?

[Sphinxy]

Phoenix, the only shamanic practitioner I can find near you is her. For some reason there are many more in Seattle than in Victoria - at least according to the Internet. If you're willing to travel (or to do distance work), I can give you more suggestions.

[Ticklebits]

I read what OP has said and some of what was in between. So i hope im not being repetitive. Id recommend recapitulation like everyone else is of course but as someone who has spent much of my life being "fed off of," this could be a positive sign. A sign that you are a healer and posess healing energy inherently. Maybe you just need a strategy. A formula to deal with always giving of yourself as a natural healer. Its like this for many healers ive met or even non healers who work with energy a lot. Anyway, just a sort of positive spin and new angle you can look at this phenomena from. PM me if youd like to talk at all. I bet we could share some interesting stories

~T